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Revision as of 18:48, 6 September 2019

[e][h]Pyroicon.png im gay
Picture of solo playing sniper
Player Information
Name:
Osama Bin Laden
Birth:
September 11, 2001 (2001-09-11) (age 22)
Died:
May 2, 2011 (2011-05-02) (age 12)
Country:
Status:
Years Active:
2018 - Present
Team:
FROYOTECH
Role:
Nicknames:
DELICIOUS COCK , OBAMA
Links
ETF2L Player Page
Steam Profile Twitch Stream YouTube Channel
Achievements
First Place UGC Highlander Season 25 Silver 1st Place
Second Place ETF2L Highlander Season 16 Div1 Second Place ETF2L Highlander Season 17 Div2 Second Place UGC Highlander Season 19 Silver 2st Place ETF2L Highlander Season 18 Div1 Second Place
Third Place/Semifinalist(s) ETF2L Highlander Season 15 Mid Third Place ETF2L Highlander Season 14 Mid Third place UGC 6v6 Season 21 Steel 3rd place RGL Season 2 Div1 Third Place
Fourth Place ETF2L Highlander Season 13 Mid PlayOff Placement ETF2L 6v6 Season 26 Open PlayOff Placement UGC Highlander Season 22 Platinum 4th Place
Prize Money
2016 - Present
$10000000000

History

My name is Yoshikage Kira. I'm 33 years old. My house is in the northeast section of Morioh, where all the villas are, and I am not married. I work as an employee for the Kame Yu department stores, and I get home every day by 8 PM at the latest. I don't smoke, but I occasionally drink. I'm in bed by 11 PM, and make sure I get eight hours of sleep, no matter what. After having a glass of warm milk and doing about twenty minutes of stretches before going to bed, I usually have no problems sleeping until morning. Just like a baby, I wake up without any fatigue or stress in the morning. I was told there were no issues at my last check-up. I'm trying to explain that I'm a person who wishes to live a very quiet life. I take care not to trouble myself with any enemies, like winning and losing, that would cause me to lose sleep at night. That is how I deal with society, and I know that is what brings me happiness. Although, if I were to fight I wouldn't lose to anyone.

$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$

Oh mine god, i accidentally sent thou a picture of mine cock and balls. prithee Delete it!! lest... thou desire to look? haha i jest, delete it. should thee crave... haha nay, banish it... lest?

$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$

Heathrow airport 25 years ago, I’m in a stall in the bathroom, and the gentleman next to me was having a really hard time. We’re talking grunts, splashes, moans, farts; it really did sound like He was shitting out his innards. In the middle of this there’s a little boy in the bathroom, maybe like five years old, knocking on each stall door and asking in extremely British accent ” daddy? Daddy are you in there?”. Finally the boy gets to the dude stall and knock on the door, and the poor guy inside lets loose the loudest, concussive diarrhoea I have ever heard, and post drop says in an equally British accent, “not now son, go to your mother!” You could tell he was holding back something fierce to spare his kid the reality of his dad completely destroying a public restroom. The kid patters off, and he lets even more loose. I finish, wash up, and leave, and still wonder if he survived.

I AM SORRY FOR MY IGNORANCE DADDY

Sphincters are muscles. They can be toned and strengthened. A sphincter is not like a rubber-band, that loses its elasticity. It is a muscle, like a bicep, that gets stronger with use. When you go to the gym, the muscles you work are a little wonky immediately after, and sore the day after, but the workout strengthens them in time, and their capabilities expand.

Assholes and biceps react the same when stressed. Break-down, then build up stronger.

I have been a gym-rat, and as a young man, I learned to sculpt my body at will. Got up to 300# with a 34" waist once, when I was younger, at 6'4". If I told you I was an NFL lineman in the 80's. you would totally believe me, then or now. The rhythm is, work out hard, then feel sick and weak for a while. Sore the next day. Less sore the next day. Work out harder the next day.

I have been pounded balls-deep by porn-star sized cocks, and my first toy was a 13" Jeff Stryker dildo. I have scissored violently with my wife on a double headed 18" fatty, tickling her clit with my balls, and my current go-to is a twelve-incher as thick as my wrist, with a head like a tennis ball. Strength...

I always trust my farts, because my sphincter can pass basketballs and crush walnuts. Never shat a drop I didn't want to.

I do not happen to own a vagina, but my wife, conveniently, does. My wife has passed two babies south-bound, and something like sixty dicks north-bound, often two at a time (dicks, not babies.) You shove a skinny four-incher into her right now, in her fifties, and freeze, and she will milk all your jizz, and much of your soul out the tip. Strength...

Muscles, not rubber-bands. Be at peace, as you be at piece...

I forgive english, i am russia.

i come to study clothing and fashion at american university.

i am here little time and i am very hard stress.

i am gay also and this very difficult for me,

i am very religion person.

i never act to be gay with other men before.

but after i am in america six weeks i am my friend together he is gay also.

he was show me american fashion and then we are kiss.

we sex together.

i never before now am tell my mother about gay because i am very shame.

as i fock this american boy it is very good to me but also i am feel so guilty.

i feel extreme guilty as i begin orgasm.

i feel so guilty that i pick up my telephone and call mother in russia.

i awaken her.

it too late for stopping so i am cumming sex.

i am very upset and guilty and crying,

so i yell her,

"i am cum from sex"

(in russia).

she say what?

i say

"i am cum from sex"

and she say you boy,

do not marry american girl,

and i say

"no i am cum from sex with man,

i am in ass,

i cum in ass"

and my mother very angry me.

she not get scared though.

i hang up phone and am very embarrass.

my friend also he is very embarrass.

i am guilt and feel very stupid.

i wonder,

why do i gay with man?

but i continue because when it spurt it feel very good in american ass.

Ich habe aber auch keinen Zweifel darüber gelassen, daß, wenn die Völker Europas wieder nur als Aktienpakete dieser internationalen Geld- und Finanzverschwörer angesehen werden, dann auch jenes Volk mit zur Verantwortung gezogen werden wird, das der eigentliche Schuldige an dieses mörderischen Ringen ist: Das Judentum! Ich habe weiter keinen darüber im Unklaren gelassen, daß dieses Mal nicht nur Millionen Kinder von Europäern der arischen Völker verhungern werden, nicht nur Millionen erwachsener Männer den Tod erleiden und nicht nur Hunderttausende an Frauen und Kindern in den Städten verbrannt und zu Tode bombardiert werden dürfen, ohne daß der eigentliche Schuldige, wenn auch durch humanere Mittel, seine Schuld zu büssen hat.